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fri posted: Fri 2017-12-22 08:40:20 tags: gaming
Today's Bookbub bargains email included David Brooks (conservative "social commentator" columnist and author of The Social Animal): The Road to Character (2015-04). I have to wonder if this is not just basically a rewrite of Peck's classic The Road Less Traveled: A New Psychology of Love, Traditional Values and Spiritual Growth. Alas, while Amazon facilitates questions about other types of product, I don't see anyplace to ask questions about this book. Reading the critical reviews, I heard Brooks cheated on his wife of 28 years and dumped her for his research assistant, a woman 23 years his junior. So there's a serious question of how qualified Brooks is to pontificate on "character". His Wikipedia bio is naturally less polemical, noting that he divorced Mrs. Brooks the first (who converted to Judaism and changed her name from Jane to Sarah, presumably for him) in 2014 and married the former research assistant, Anne Snyder, in 2017. So the glowing credits to Snyder in the book's preface didn't see print until after the first marriage was already broken, and then there was another 2 years before the new knot was tied.

Psychology Today: 10 Signs of a Narcissistic Parent narcissist
When I was a teen trying to sort out my values, I went though a phase where I took "arrogance" as a compliment. I have a remarkable talent for excruciatingly correct spelling, grammar and idiom; I felt entitled to look down on people who didn't. I have gotten quite a bit better but I still regress now and then, and this fundamentally certain sense, and attendant attitudes of superiority and dismissiveness, sometimes spill over into murkier ideological positions.

The example quote in the article, “My father’s favorite responses to my views were: ‘but…,’ ‘actually…,’ and ‘there’s more to it than this…’ He always has to feel like he knows better.” ... struck a chord with me. My father could argue in circles for hours, derailing if you nailed him down on some inconsistency or claiming he was just trying to say the same thing as you all along. There was nothing he didn't understand, there was no topic on which he simply didn't have enough info to judge, and there was nothing of importance he could be further educated on. With a few rare exceptions (e.g. my talent for computer programming), if someone had some skill that he lacked, then he trivialized it. What he could do well was important and everyone should recognize its importance. What other people could do better than him was frivolous and suspect. So for example, he's been butting heads with doctors more and more as his health declines in old age, because he knows better than doctors what tests are necessary and what diagnoses are consistent with the test results. And of course, confronted with any reminder of times he was abusive or corrupt - it's rationalized, or he "doesn't remember it that way", or he denies memory at all.

Most people exhibit some hallmark narc' traits now and then - arrogant posturing or emotionally manipulative strategies in a heated argument, neurotic inflexibility in a particular area, etc. The hallmark paradox of disorder-grade maladaption is that the subject doesn't feel they have a problem, perhaps that their maladaptive strategies and reactions are valid/healthy/adaptive. The corrolary is, if you recognize a little of yourself in examples of personality disorder and recognize how manipulation, rigidity, etc. create more problems than they solve, then you're not NPD. You're just a regular, self-aware person with some maladaptive mental habits that can be mitigated through therapy.

Having educated myself about maladaptive atrategies and reactions, what I hope is that I have become more able to recognize when I'm acting from those bases and not merely "open" but "actively working" to replace maladaptive with adaptive habits.

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The latest promo in Castle Age is 8 copies of general Dawn plus 3 stamina refill potions for 235 favor points. Normally Dawn costs 30fp per copy, and 3 potions is 25fp, so it's a bit of a discount. Doing the general rank-up math, I saw that ranking up from 1 star with this promo would bring Dawn to 4-stars plus two spare copies of Dawn left over. You'd have to buy another 3 copies at full price to reach 5-star rank. What I didn't realize was, if your Dawn is ALREADY 5-star, then you need 8 copies to rank up to 6-star and these sorts of promos are the only way to buy more of a general once you've reached 5-star rank. So the sequence is: plow 330 FP into 11 copies (or 360FP/12 copies, if you had no Dawn at all), rank her up to 5, then buy the promo and rank up again to 6-stars. If you're that spendy, you may as well also get her 3 gear items (30FP each, 90 total) for the 10% gear set bonus. Total FP: 360+235+90 = 685. For reference, $90 buys 650 FP on the non-Facebook Castle Age website.