login
tue posted: Tue 2018-10-02 07:18:40 tags: n/a
lined up lawn care and locksmithing for Thu
picking up ashes

The fallout of having a gaslighter for a father is, even though I know what I personally experienced, and even though there's a preponderance of witnesses to corroborate a consensus of defective character... when I feel angry or disgusted, I automatically check myself as if my entitlement to those (normal, valid, proportional) feelings is somehow still uncertain.

* * *

My schoolboy ambition was to write stories in the genre I immersed myself in, heroic fantasy.

Nobody thought this was a realistic ambition, nor worthwhile to encourage, and it went into hibernation.

Back in the early-mid 90s, Frank and I brainstormed a milieu in which to tell a story from a dragon's perspective, or perhaps with the dragon as the central unifying force. "Vex", admittedly derivative of Anne Rice's Lestat chronicles. A bit later I toyed with the idea of deriving as much from "1001 Arabian Nights", but with more adult elements.

Not sure how I intended to do that, not having ever read "Arabian Nights". So this is why I should have studied more literature and wasted less time in academics of theory-of-education, psychology, math, comp.sci and philosophy.

* * *