pull moozadell from cellar frz

accts registers updt, pay bills thru EOM

* * *

- At 9 months and counting, the resume gap is only getting more awkward;
- AND Zero income is scary;
- THEREFORE No I'm not ruling out local temp work.
- It's not ignoring or betraying previous conversation about where to settle.

I said very plainly what I was fed up with: the bad-faith insinuation of "iii are you not talking to me". After 10 years and countless instances of it never actually being true, I'm done entertaining it as if it's a genuine question.

why it's bad-faith-y:
The question pretends there's a genuine inquiry when there isn't.
By framing it as a question, it leverages plausible deniability ("I was just asking!"),
but the subtext is accusation: you are giving me the silent treatment.
This puts the recipient on defensive footing to prove they're not doing something they never did.

Since the answer has never been "yes, I'm not talking to you," the repeated use suggests the speaker knows this too. That makes it less about seeking information and more about:
- Emotional Pressure
- Deflecting focus away from the actual issue
- Moving goalposts - Even if you respond, the frame remains: now you're "explaining" rather than engaging on equal footing

The No-Win Dynamic:
. If you deny it defensively, you look guilty
. If you don't respond immediately, you confirm the accusation
. If you engage earnestly, you validate a false premise

This is a form of what relationship experts sometimes call "false accusation framing". It's related to gaslighting because it pressures you to question whether your normal behavior is actually problematic.

And the later message that ignored what I spelled out plainly, and rewrote it as me being "upset that you were upset", makes it worse.